“It is what it is 🤷🏾‍♂️”

I don’t know exactly when this phrase became a staple in my lexicon, but looking back, I cannot think of a time when it wasn’t.

I recently learned that people who tend to use this turn of phrase are some of the most dangerous people you’ll ever meet/know.

Why? Because they’re unf*ckwithable.

They’ve been hardened.

They’ve mastered the art of acceptance and won’t let things outside of their control affect them. So, if you try to manipulate, threaten, or push their boundaries, you’re out of luck.

They don’t care.

They’ll show you the door and tell you exactly where to get the F*ck off the ride.

I’m that person. It’s about time I accepted it.

“Really… YOU!? You’re like the most chilled person I’ve ever met!”

Yes, I know right. They always say you should watch out for the quiet ones.

"A harmless man is not a good man. A good man is a very dangerous man who has that under voluntary control." - Jordan Peterson.

For the longest time, I’ve been afraid.

Afraid of my potential.

I’ve always known I’ve got the potential to be dangerous, and rather than embrace, unlock and master my potential, I’ve buried it thinking it’s better to be a harmless, “big for nothing but cuddles” kinda guy.

That’s not a good look… well it might be - chubby guys cuddle better. But denying who you are isn’t.

I heard the quote from Peterson many months ago, and it has challenged my identity and self-image for some time, as I couldn’t reconcile the paradox between being both dangerous and good.

The example Peterson gives to explain this is the martial arts - particularly the very skilled and proficient ones. These people are indeed very dangerous, but you don’t learn a martial art to learn to fight people; you learn it to master and control yourself.

I’ve been on a journey of self-discovery and healing for a while, and it hasn’t been easy, but it’s the right thing to do.

Virtue signalling aside, men, boys, bruhs, gents and lads - whatever - we live in a loveless world; learn to embrace yourself.

Your whole self.

Be dangerous, but be in control - always.